Hungry herbivore

Everyone knows that children have very fertile imaginations.  One minute Jakub is blasting off in a rocket ship and the next he's a firefighter off to the rescue.  Lately, his characters of choice have been dinosaurs, and he begs me daily to play his favorite dinosaur song.  This evening, when the boys were playing in the back yard and Jakub proclaimed "Mommy, I'm going to eat leaves," you'll perhaps forgive me for absentmindedly answering "Uh-huh, that's really interesting, honey."  He had a mulberry leaf halfway to his mouth before I realized he wasn't just playing make-believe and I was forced to spring my weary bones into action.  Now, I'm pretty sure mulberry leaves aren't poisonous, but we do have two large oleander bushes in our yard--which are extremely poisonous--and I didn't want him to get in the habit of plucking leaves off of random plants and eating them.  So, Jakub got a very serious lecture on how we can't just eat anything we come across, that some things will make us very, very sick and that the only leaves he's allowed to eat are the ones in our refrigerator.  I realize that the last statement might lead to some complicated explanations later, but decided to cross that bridge when we come to it.  Fortunately, Jakub seemed to sense the urgency of my message, and when I asked if he understood what I was saying, he nodded gravely and said, "Yes, mommy," but as he was walking away, he added, "I'm just going to eat grass now."  *sigh*  Parenting would be a lot easier if I had an advanced law degree.  If your argument has too many loopholes, you're going to run into trouble.

Super Simple Dried Apple Bits

This is a super easy recipe that's great to do with your kids.

*Note: this recipe works best if you live in a hot, arid climate.  Or hell.*

Ingredients:

1 small apple (I used Gala)

Directions:

1) Chop apple into small, bite-sized pieces

2) Place into a small container (a snack cup works best)

3) Give container, opened, to your young child as you strap them into their car seat for morning errands

4) Watch in your rear view mirror as your child eats one apple bit and then joyfully flings the remainder of the container about the car in various directions

5) Pull any errant pieces from your hair and/or from behind the collar of your shirt

6) Go about your day as usual, since you don't have the time to clean out your car at this moment

7) At 9:00 p.m., when your kids are finally asleep, go into your car and scavenge for dried apple bits.  For best results, make sure your hair is properly disheveled and you have several mysterious stains on your clothing that probably won't come out.

8) Brush off any Cheerio crumbs/dog hair/dirt/lint

9) Enjoy.